Sex and the City: Does it Still Hold Up?

There are some shows so iconic that might as well be assigned homework for girls who are feeling confused during their 20s and 30s. Personally, I love Girls, Broad City, New Girl, Friends, and several others, but there’s one show I’ve been told to watch as it is a rite of passage into adulthood multiple times since I turned 18. Finally, I have taken the leap to watch Sex and the City for the first time — and yes, I feel very Carrie writing this column.

I had a few questions going in. Mainly, as a show that began in the 90s, would it hold up in terms of commentary on modern dating and friendship? Of course, I expected opinions and moments attuned to the time’s perspectives and did find that to hold true. One example involves Carrie and her friends’ debate on whether or not they could date a bisexual man. For the sake of this article, I’m going to look at the show with an understanding that we, as a society, have hopefully evolved past certain takes on display throughout the series.

One of the common complaints I have heard is that the four leading ladies are completely out of touch. My response, three and a half seasons in, is OF COURSE … it’s a show! I found it helpful to suspend disbelief about the Sex and the City universe where you get free shoes, eat out every night, and can drink three cosmos without resulting in a hangover. As a writer myself, I found my mind wandering to “how does Carrie only write an article a week and afford to buy designer clothes.” I would suggest just leaning in and recognizing this as a work of fiction: a fun show that happens to have had a profound impact on popular culture with some poignant things to say.

I want to pay my respects to what it meant to have a show unapologetically discuss women’s sexuality in the late 90s. In the media, women were — and continue to be — characterized as docile, subservient to the men in their lives. In fact, the official site states that only 57% of the movies in their database passes the Bechdel Test, meaning it has “at least two [named] women in it who talk to each other about something besides a man.”

While this seems like a low bar, so much of film and television doesn’t even come close to a pass. Yes, Sex and the City often involves the main women talking about men, but it also is a story of friendship and finding meaning and empowerment within the self amid dating disasters. 

The story also surrounds Carrie – a writer unapologetically discussing romance and sexuality in her popular newspaper column as she and her friends encounter the trials and tribulations of NYC dating. It normalized 1) women even talking about their personal lives, even if that is stigmatized and 2) the messy behavior that women are expected and allowed to engage in as they find themselves.

These are the messages that undoubtedly hold up in the year of 2026. There’s something comforting about knowing that these women are living and making mistakes, and that millions of female viewers have felt seen by the same show for more than 20 years. To this day, 20- and 30-somethings debate whether they are a Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte, or a Miranda. When their friends respond, they know exactly what they mean. Personally, I see myself as a Carrie – a writer guilty of romanticizing/overanalyzing her own life – and a Charlotte, dreaming of finding meaningful love in the bookstore/coffee shop down the street. 

Going in, I assumed it was more on the dramatic side of comedy. I was pleased and excited to learn that Sex and the City is HILARIOUS. It satirizes the mishaps of modern dating that continue to hold relevance today – dating a loud breather, being introduced as “just a friend” to your boyfriend’s mom, pretending to be interested in sports, and losing the love of your life to a younger woman.

Even with its obvious imperfections amid a world of glitz, glam, and expensive nights out, the core of Sex and the City remains relatable as an accurate portrayal of figuring out how to move through adulthood. I am utterly addicted to the show, as Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte, and Samantha start to feel like my own friends that I am occasionally very concerned about. 

Three seasons left. I’ll watch them all by the end of the week.

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